New mane

Clearing up space on my mac & putting out some pix out to the world so I can delete them.

This is probably the brightest I've gone since post-secondary school period.

I usually stick to dark brown - classy, easy to maintain without the bore of black.

Decided to let loose a little...hence this lion's mane.

Now, let me proceed to roar.

xx

Za's tummy rumbles

Love #chatuchakmarket

Used the paper flowers i bought there to make this gorgeous flower headpiece. Not for myself though. Couldn't help but to camwhore with it once I was done with this. It's gorgeous!

Thanking God for this period of rest, of putting me right back on track in life.

Recharged.

x

from the pages:

a passion, do you - the question herein - do you make profession out of passion?
to wringe so dry, a love so free, just to pocket some money.

Lest i forget. How apt.
Melissa - DO NOT FORGET. How utterly misplaced your trust has been. It was never change per say. You were merely looking through rose-coloured lenses, for the longest time.

God, just stab myself already.

To be a good..everything

All of life's a balancing act.

Is it my hormones? Sometimes I think it's plain unnerving how I'm needed to be a good everything.

Is it possible to be a good everything? To have it all together all the time. To wake up like clockwork, to head to work, to do what I do, to come home and be a daughter, a sister.

I have neglected many of my other roles i realise, today. Of being a good granddaughter, of being a good daughter of His, or his.

Is there a manual to all this? It has to be in the bible, right?

Huge sigh.

Find love in everything. Go bersek once in a blue moon. I shall aim for that.

Update from Mars

In a blink of an eye, half a year has passed. Half of the first year i ventured out into the world, in attempt to make something out of myself. To exchange my time for cash. To get inspired. To discover.

I must say though, that I never thought that work was going to be tiring. Sure, I had done some work prior to this. But it was never...8/9 hours straight, 5 days a week, and the fact of the matter is there really isn't an end to it.

I guess this is what happens what you work for someone else -- "If you don't chase your dreams, someone will make you chase theirs"

These five/six months, ..the Man upstairs has truly put in my path, some really great, wise people. It's interesting to see how quickly things changed once I left school. Actually, I hadn't really realized the drastic change till now! Wow. Work, forex, I barely even update my social media outlets anymore. I barely even open those apps. 

Treasuring every single snuggle moment with za. With Tyf. Hoping to spend more time with the fam. Is this how it feels like? To have time become such a scarce resource, everything else that's unimportant gets automatically zeroed out? It feels good, yet kinda tiring.

I love reflecting. love, love, love. These minutes spend here just letting my words flow and take form in front of me -- it feels utterly therapeutic. (I love my apple keypad) I should do this more.

There's something more that needs to be done though, I know. 

1. Get inspired.

2. Inspire.

#bitchesfallaway #no,idgaf

xx

Hello again

I guess I'm in a good place now..save for the occasional struggle here & there.
Sometimes I wonder......

How time flies. I'm about to turn 23 in a couple of days. Amazing how 10, 20 years have passed.

Drifting off into lalaland now.

Lots of loooooove

You are my world

You are my world - with every soulful look you give, with every furry cuddle i receive.

It's easy to love our little mutts wholeheartedly, and unreservedly. For the only sorrow that could come out of it is its imminent death (which I'm praying doesn't ever ever come...)

When it comes to choosing the one and only to whom we bestow our affection on, it's the same, yet different. Falling in love with every careless laugh, with his warm tight hugs....the list goes on. The possibility of hurt and sadness is, too, endless.

Everyone seems to advocate loving freely, to live as each day it is your last. But who really does that now days? From the aunt who stays cautiously single till middle age, to the friend we all have that does the occasional spot check on her other half - worry and doubt seems to be second nature.

Which brings me to want to google the solution: Trust.
In a nutshell, it involves being open with our thoughts and feelings, keeping our word and having moral integrity. To me, it's thinking the best of the person. (Which is not as easy as it seems - at least to me) But I'm trying!

Trust trust trust, the enabler by which we can love wholeheartedly.

It's opportunity costs are efforts that are for naught, wasted time and emotions.

So there....an analysis of the random thoughts in my head this morning. Thoughts that occurred when I see Zara bounding around on my bed, which made my heart swell with <3 ...="" nbsp="" p="">
You see, I'm a pessimistic person that tries to talk myself into being optimistic. 

Survival

Strange, how there was this terrifyingly ominous feeling when I told my girlfriend that I wanted to join her for an Open Waters Dive course. 

Being neither a proficient swimmer - I can't trap water before or swim lengths < 30m, I felt that bein in the water, among the great depths of the ocean...was something to be feared. And yes it should be. Drowning is an ever-present possibility. 

But the beauty of the ocean and it's inhabitants were a great lure to me. To be able to visit them and interact with them with such close proximity, to chance upon these wonderous creatures was something I have always wanted to do. That, and diving seems like an awesome cool sport. 

Also, my unwritten (still unwritten i suppose!) resolution for the year was to push boundaries daily, stepping out of my comfort zone one day at a time. 

Here I am, all done with two dives and about to zonk out right under the setting sun. Albeit the complexities and discomfort of being in a foreign "body" (body of water that is), I reckon I'll be back again soon.  

I need to see some sea turtles!

My fears unfounded and God was there with me. My rly good instructor, too. This shall be testament to myself to show how pushing personal boundaries are entirely do-able & I CAN DO IT! 

xx

the three girlsxz

Dreams

"Work for your dreams, or someone will make you work for theirs."

I love this piece of advice...yet if everyone were to heed it, there would be an abundance of failed businesses and one-man shows.

One day, I will want to work for my dreams and see it through. Till then, it's all about learning and learning and learning & gaining exposure to know what is my dream.

#soundslikeaplan